How the 'He's adopted' line should have gone
  • Natasha: He killed 80 people in two days.
  • Thor: I stormed into Jottunheim intent on starting a war and killed dozens of frost giants in under an hour.
  • Bruce: ....I'm pretty sure the other guy's killed over a hundred in less time...
  • Tony: I created bombs designed to kill hundreds in seconds, and was proud of it.
  • Natasha: *looks down* Admittedly, the red in my ledger is pretty horrible, too...
  • Steve: ...well, this is awkward.
11/18-12
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10/27-12
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10/06-12
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… I’d like to wipe it out.
… I’d like to wipe it out.

09/28-12
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It’s 1943, I’m on an island off the coast of Peru staring down a giant mechanical eyeball from outer space. A woman named Jerri Quimby— who, for all I know, was dead before I was born—pilots the commandeered alien vessel to my left while the rest of her Banshee Squadron try to hold off the Japanese troops advancing on the ground. These girls have never seen anything like this in their lives. 

I’m an Avenger. We call this Tuesday.

09/28-12
(254)
What would it be like to have the Avengers as Parents?
  • Me: Dad/Mom, my boyfriend broke my heart :(
  • Captain America: I punched Hilter in the face. This punk isn't any different. Where is he?
  • Ironman: Where does he live? I'll buy his house, evict his sorry ass, and then tear it down to build you a library
  • Hulk: Boyfriend broke daughter's heart?! HULK SMASH!!
  • Thor: This Midgardian does not know who he be dealing with. As the prince of Asgard he shall suffer greatly for his crimes! *thunder boom*
  • Black Widow: Kick him in the nuts, sweetie. You won't get in trouble at home.
  • Hawkeye: Caw, caw, mothafucker! *shoots him with an arrow*
  • Loki: *mind controls him and makes him do embarrassing things* Eheheheh LOKI'D!
09/20-12
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